modest mouse..
i have Crest Whitestrips on my teeth. for another 12 minutes and 40 seconds.
“you update your wordpress way too often” – jonathan o’keefe

i never update. um so i’m graduating friday. no more high school for ever ever. i didn’t cry on my last day, and i may not even cry at graduation. i mean to some extent i’m going to be sad to be leaving, but in a lot of ways i really just need a break from the high school agenda. i’m in no way putting myself above anything. but everyone can only take so much… and i’d had enough by the beginning of senior year. probably before then.
i’m just so ready to start over it’s ridiculous. and i want to watch everyone else start over. (or some of them anyway.)

when i think of something to say, i guess i’ll say it..

concerning the A.P. English Literature exam are what I dread..
‘ “No one has come forward in defense of laughter. No, laughter is more meaningful and more profound than [most think]. . . .Those who say that laughter incites are unjust. Only the dismal incites, while laughter gives light. Many things would incite man if presented in their nakedness; but illuminated by the power of laughter, they bring reconciliation to the soul.” -Gogol
Choose a novel, play, or long poem that illuminates the human condition through the power of laughter. In a well-constructed essay, explain how the work expresses one or more profound truths about human beings and discuss the specific techniques the author uses to convey these ideas.’
. . . . .
My evening.

There aren’t many subjects that make me think on an extremely deep level. I don’t recall a time when I was able to rant on one subject and use big words and phrases to back myself up. I need practice in thinking. Can one practice thinking?
It is interesting, though, how I was watching something on TV about the polio epidemic in Nigeria.. and how much this one little boy squealed and screamed when he was receiving his vaccination. And I can completely remember how terrifying watching a thin needle penetrate my skin was, and how there was no way in my mind that that process could benefit me whatsoever. I guess what I’m saying is, the more innocent you are, the more you don’t understand that you have to endure small amounts of pain in order to benefit something greater. That little boy most likely didn’t realize that his little sister was paralyzed from the disease for which he was being vaccinated.. and he probably wouldn’t understand.

I am going to be so depressed without Bonnie next year.

…and I think I’ll go to Monroe this weekend.

All the babies have good homes now.

Never underestimate your grandparents. This weekend made me appreciate Grammy&Pop so much. I went to visit because Grammy had dental surgery and she’s really weak from recovering, and my mom knew if I went with her to visit it would lift her spirits a lot. Pop told me and my mom more about when he was in WWII then my mom’s ever heard before. I’m so glad I went.

Creative Writing is still a joke. We haven’t made the slightest bit of progress in any way, shape or form. I wish I had known Ms Stainton (sp?). So so so ready to be done with that place.

For my independent reading in English I’m going to read Their Eyes Were Watching God by Zora Neale Hurston. Apparently it’s like.. straight dialect. I hope I can handle it. I like books like that.

Senior party!!!!!!!!!!!!!!320981024

Bonnie(s) wobble but they don’t fall down

9:41 a.m. I’m never up this early. Actually, it’s usually on Sundays that I’m up this early. I like it.
I’m making vegan pancakes for lunch/brunch. They’re so easy. Baking soda, flour, sugar, vanilla extract, soymilk and a few other things. And since my dad is making a grocery run on the way home, I’m going to get him to pick up some blueberries.
I’m going to a Dirty Dorm party later. Like Dirty Santa, but you get free stuff for your dorm. (!) I think I’m bringing a big photo holder thing. Someone will want it.

I’m so in love with the puppies at my mom’s house. I seriously would keep all of them if I could. I want people I know to take them so I can visit them always. They’re so wonderful.
This guy on True Life: I’m a Nuyorican said something about “cahones” in a sentence. Hehe.

*Correction: Whitney did come up with the “merrily, merrily” idea. I have trouble remembering that far back.

Currently listening to: “Nothing, Then” by Punch Brothers (Chris Thile, anyone? I sincerely recommend listening to this stuff, soo relaxing).
{P.S. totally seeing them tomorrow night!!!}

Brenda seems to have stacks of workout videos. And I found a Beginner Yoga video, which I’m so excited about. Since I have the whole upstairs foyer to myself, I don’t have to worry about looking stupid, and it’ll help me de-stress. I’ve never done yoga before. I’m pumped.

JFP ends February 26th ): . I’ll be using my free time exercising and carrying out last minute senior responsibilities, I suppose.

My excitement for college grows daily. I can’t even believe how close I am to graduating.

Karaoke Senior Party March 28th? Mmhmm. Hal and Mal’s Red Room. (It’s also Jonathan’s birthday that day.. so it’ll have to be a double-celebration. Bring him vegan treats. Hint hint).

Remember that time a long time ago (directed at Whitney) that I suggested making your senior quote “Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily, life is but a dream” ?

Well. I think I’m doing that now.

Free Press is losing its flare, as much as I hate to admit it.

I made the point to Maddy last night that, this time last year, I’d be spending about 6-8 hours a week doing active Encore-stuff. That’s today replaced by 6-7 hours a week sitting at a desk in an office, then leaving and going straight home (except for the days I’m not exhausted and don’t mind getting home late, then I’ll go to the gym and work out for maybe an hour). So the total amount of active/exercise time I’m getting now is SERIOUSLY lacking.. It’s a problem, and the only way to resolve it is to make more time, meaning less or no Free Press.
My dad also said the other day, “Once it’s not new anymore, it’s just plain work.” And he’s right. But what do I do here? Give my two weeks notice? Eh. Maybe I’ll just give Maggie a resignation date for the end of this month or something.
I feel bad though. It feels like I’m leaving a part of me. It would feel kind of like switching schools. And I’d have my afternoons back, which would be weird. But I think I’d like that, and I’m about to be done with high school, so it couldn’t hurt.

Isn’t it weird how the first few entries I started doing on here were raving about JFP and how excited I was? I mean I still love it. But sometimes it’s too much of a sacrifice if I’m not getting much benefit out of it, when I could be running and doing some much much needed calorie burning.
And then I hear the “Just quit crying and go in the morning.” And as logical as that sounds, I just can’t make myself. Bleh.
I know, I know, Jonathan. You told me so.

My dad and I decided on London/Ireland/Scotland right when school gets out.

I’m going to see Chris Thile and the Punch Brothers Friday…oh my gawd.
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewProfile&friendID=41872778

[: [: [:

Advice: Lay off on coffee if you’re really into drinking it for a week – give or take – and you feel so amazing when you finally do. I don’t get caffeine headaches, so I guess I didn’t notice, but I was really cold today and wanted a soy latte from Cups, and I’ve been in a good mood since 3:00 this afternoon. Oh, lawhd.

www.rock939.com
^^^^ SO SLUM. I had to do some research on them for JFP today, and I couldn’t even handle the slum, and I started laughing a lot more than necessary.

Millsaps Performing Arts Scholarship tryout Mondayyyy… 10:50 AM if you wanna come support me (and they might let you sit in on my monologues). It’ll be fun (fud, dud, lud…).

Today we didn’t have to wear a uniform to school AND they let us wear whatever outerwear we wanted. It was so weird. JA looked like a normal school today. We get to do that again tomorrow. It’s cause of the weather and the fact that the admin is realizing that Parker outerwear just doesn’t cut it. What what.

I haven’t been here in a few weeks, and I forgot how often I’m found without anything to do. In the beginning, Donna said we always need to stay occupied…but it’s like when you’re out of school and you go back the first day, you don’t usually have homework that night (or much anyway)..
I’m in front of the computer at the office and I spent about 20 free minutes looking up veg recipes for Valentine’s Day dinner (aww x 4) and I’m getting excited. I feel like I could pig out on dairy-free food and not feel guilty or gross. Whenever I eat Toffitti cream cheese on bagels I feel healthy, which is weird because generally bagels make me feel ultra huge.
I’m going to do a Q&A (well it’s still pending) with this organization called PRIYDE that is based out of the Jackson Medical Mall (I think) that teaches underpriveleged youth about financial management and skills that are important in employment so that they can be encouraged to get a head start on their future. Neat!
There are so many wedding things in the issue coming out tomorrow. I love wedding things. Yay matrimony.

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yawn

Whenever I walk away from Bonnie if she’s sitting and leaning on me while on the couch, she looks at me as if I’m going away for a really long time. And if I actually walk out of the room, she’ll jump off the couch, try to guess where I’m walking to, and try to beat me there. A lot of times I yell at her because she trips me. She’s just competitive, and has never been outside, and thinks I’m a cat/she’s a human, and nothing ever phases her. Ever.

I don’t think anyone ever read my short story. But Miss Brown gave me a 95, which is like the highest she’ll ever give. Whatever, when I’m in my mid-30s I won’t take out my anger through my unjust grading scale and biased opinions on innocent high school students because I turned down a date with Brett Favre before he got famous and I still live with my mom. Just sayin’.

I start Economics with Ms. Curry tomorrow. I’ve never had Ms. Curry as an educator before.

I’m ready to get my acceptance/non acceptance letters back, even though I’m pretty decided on where I’m going. I probably won’t get most of them until Marchish/Aprilish.

My new camera is so amazing. Ugh, devices like that were just put on earth to make people happy. I need to take a photog enrichment course fo sho.

I go back to JFP tomorrow. They’re offering to pay interns to freelance write. FREELANCE. For PAY. [=

I’m hesitant to start reading Wuthering Heights. Maddy said it was good. I have to have it finished by Feb 20th. Bleh.

The less cheese I eat, the clearer my skin is….dot dot dot